Why am I so curious? Is that bad?
I have a short attention span for small talk but an odd curiosity for the vulnerable stuff we don’t tell relative strangers. Are we really strangers though? Wouldn’t it be so intriguing if we would just say the more personal parts of ourselves outright? Then we wouldn’t be such strangers and it would be much more interesting to have a conversation.
I really really want to know who people really really are.
The stuff that scares me scares you and everyone else, although we try to hide it. Why do we hide it from each other if we all have such similar fears?
I want to talk about how imperfections are beautiful and unique. Wabi sabi.
I’m cognitively turned on by close divulgences. It is the naughty inner bits. Our society doesn’t like it, it wants us all to cover it up and make it over with cool nonchalance and disconnect. We usually only reveal these secret thoughts and dreams to those we really trust, but why? I want to know.
It’s awkward and rude to ask these things outright, so I get to sneak it in as a profession. It’s not nosiness, it’s curiosity and care. I have no interest in gossip, juicy secrets, dramatic tales or wallowing in problems. I just want to ask because no one is really asking.
There are doctors that we go to to pry into places on ourselves that we usually only reserve for select individuals, but we show ourselves to these white-garbed strangers because we want to make sure we’re ok. Why is there not something similar for our thoughts and feelings?
Because I know just as well as you do that there are times where we don’t feel ok, and it’s nothing that a doctor can look at. We know there’s no need for a therapist. It’s just life and we should be able to handle.
But we don’t. Because life is difficult. We guilt ourselves for feeling discontent while we have clean water and a roof over our heads — and sometimes that realization is all we need to get ourselves in check. But some things really are legit first world problems. We are humans in a complex world.
Things like contradictory pressures from everyone and everything, too many choices, too many extreme measures as an answer to our problems. Expectations for us to handle it all. Expectations for us to never malfunction unless we were traumatized as a child or faced terrible conditions — and even then it’s iffy. The common fully-functioning human is expected to inherently know how to run itself perfectly in a crazy society with paradoxical expectations.
We’re expected to be normal in a very abnormal situation.
The answer isn’t living in a bus in the woods, or blaming politics or Miley or Fox, or acquiring more crystals, doing more yoga, or escaping mentally or physically. The answer is to connect more.
It’s scary to share our inner ongoings. It’s vulnerable and honest. I’m just as scared of that as anyone else. But when we aren’t being heard, open, honest, and understood, that is where all of our biggest problems begin.
There’s so many of us, yet loneliness is huge. So many of us, yet people are still killing themselves or others because they feel like no one understands.
We’re naturally highly adaptive and creative creatures living in a world that proclaims to encourage individuality yet only helps and supports those who fit in with the major ideals, and we are all coping with this in our own completely unique ways. It’s so exciting how we all have our own take on things, how no one has the exact same perceptions and thoughts and viewpoints yet we all stem from the same human conditions.
This is why you’re so interesting, and this is why I’m so curious.